Hi all. I've been a vegan for six years with no problem. Even those first few weeks, which are supposed to be the hardest, weren't that difficult for me. I'm from the UK originally, but now I've moved to Vietnam for a bit. The food is great, but it's very different. There are fake meats abound, but not a lot in the way of veggie burgers, fake roast meat, etc. This shouldn't matter - we are not slaves to taste, after all - but, these are the foods of home. I'm suffering from homesickness and culture shock, and every detail counts. That's why, I think, my eyes keep lingering on the ready to eat beef burgers and chicken sandwiches in the 24 hour convenience store. I have to do what other vegans have done, but which I have never previously had to do; remind myself of the evil of animal agriculture, in order to stay on the right side. Before, I just did veganism. I didn't need to remind myself of anything. I didn't need to watch slaughterhouse videos. I did veganism, because I knew it to be right. I think my moral fortitude has been eroded by my experiences here. All the rules are different. I'm away from everything I know, and I see things every day that make me think "That's not right." I know someone here who was vegetarian back in her home country (USA) and isn't any more. I wonder if she had the same experience. Before these thoughts starting getting at me, I couldn't understand why anyone would go from vegetarian to non-vegetarian, or vegan to meat eater. Surely - I thought - surely, of you had to stop being vegan for some reason (like health), you'd pick the closest approximation that you could, knowing that the ethical issues haven't changed? I now understand that life doesn't just wear down resolve. It can wear down your identity if you let it. That's why so many people go back. Out here in Vietnam, I have no support network. The only vegans are Buddhists, and although there are plenty, I don't know many of them. I live in an area where people don't speak a lot of English. I used to be surrounded by strong vegan example, namely my mother, who is a semi-famous powerhouse of veganism in the UK. She continues to run riot over Facebook, and I watch, but I watch from a distance. I eat alone. I cook alone. It makes a big difference. Worse still, the vegans I do know from back home don't invite confidences on the matter. I don't need to be lectured, I need to be felt. I want someone to say, "Yeah, it's hard for me, too. I do it, but it is hard." We don't need to pretend that it's always easy when it's not, just for the sake of encouraging others to follow suit. We should be able to be honest and say, "I hate the fact that fried chicken still makes my mouth water, but it does." That's why I'm on a support group. We have support groups because there's inherent value in the truth, be it beautiful or ugly.