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We shouldn't live with meat eaters.

Discussion in 'General' started by Consistency, Apr 19, 2018.

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  1. Consistency
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    Consistency Member

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    My question is mostly directed at those who use to live with meat eaters and got away.

    Did it make a huge change in your life?
     
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  2. alleycat

    alleycat Active Member

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    Leaving my ex was the best thing I ever did. I was vegetarian but he was not. My new partner is at least understanding of my choices and while he still eats animal products it is playing less a part of his diet.
     
  3. Lesley

    Lesley Member

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    My boyfriend is a meat eater, he completely supports me. He looks for food options for me when we go out and isn't bothered if I refuse to shop in a store.
     
  4. Consistency
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    Consistency Member

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    I used to be in a relationship with a female who I thought was not eating any animal products because she didn't when she was with me. I noticed her hygiene was that of someone eating animal products even though she showered everyday.

    Being in love tends to eliminate the cognitive dissonance that we should feel when dating someone in contradiction to our beliefs. This is mainly why I wanted to hear from those that got away from meat eaters. I feel there is a big difference between loyalty and respect. We can have a loyal partner since they benefit from the relationship but do they really respect us and our choices?

    Getting away from those who don't really respect our choices is what seems to be important.
     
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  5. Forest Nymph
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    Forest Nymph Active Member

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    I tend to agree with this. When I moved into my current apartment my roommates were supposedly vegan, vegetarian and pescatarian...I came to find out several months in the "pescatarian" was actually a rude, unapologetic meat eater who expressed her disrespect for others in obvious ways, despite promising to only eat vegetarian meals in the apartment, she didn't.

    When I have gone out on dates with meat eaters they say stupid things like "I don't MIND vegan food at all" (like I'm supposed to feel relieved they don't MIND me) and "I'm a human garbage can, I'll eat anything" (as though I'm on a health food diet instead of living an ethical life philosophy)...I also had a guy order a meat dish on our first dinner date together, and defensively say "what you think is awful other people just consider normal for their whole lives." It's like yes you stupid sack of ****, and so do people from racist families. As though it had never occurred to me that meat eaters think what they do is socially normative.

    Obviously there are respectful people who still consume meat though. There are people who only eat meat if other people buy it or cook it for them (seriously, I know two people like this right now) and people who won't eat meat in front of a vegetarian or vegan, but those people are rare.

    I think any significant other who didn't at least keep that part of themselves separate from their partner (like only ate meat occasionally and never around the vegan partner nor in the house) is problematic.
     
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  6. Plant Muncher

    Plant Muncher Guest

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    I can't agree with intolerance of others for simply making different food choices than I make any more than I can be intolerant of people that make different religious choices than I make. And let's be perfectly honest here, what you are vocalizing here is nothing less than a superior attitude for your own choices while using veganism as a baseball bat to beat the heads of non-vegans. I just have to say...YUCK!

    I've said this before with regard to relationships.... If you find yourselves at odds over veganism, perhaps you should both dodge a bullet and look elsewhere. There are just way, way more consequential issues in any relationship that will need to be compromised than each others food choices. You guys are only in your 30's. Idealism and dogma should be fading into your pasts by this point in your lives as I'm guessing many, many relationships already have. If you are unwilling or unable to compromise on a minor point like your own diets, what real chance to you really have when there are genuine issues that need to be resolved as there are in every relationship?

    The only thing I am really preaching here, and most likely on deaf ears, is tolerance for others. Fine if you don't want to live with a non-vegan. I get that. What I will never understand is trying to change someone once you are already in a relationship to your beliefs. What? You never had a clue prior that this individual didn't share your beliefs in veganism and now you are angry that they won't change for you?
     
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  7. Consistency
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    Consistency Member

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    I've been living as a supposedly vegan since 2009 and I've never been vocal about veganism or pushed it on anyone but plenty of meat eaters have been disrespectful because I don't eat the same foods as they eat.

    You don't know me and you will never understand a non-conformist as your mind is only capable of extremes.
     
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  8. Plant Muncher

    Plant Muncher Guest

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    But you know me right? You've certainly labeled me often enough. An ignorant person is also incapable of admitting their own arrogance.
     
  9. Consistency
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    Consistency Member

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  10. Bruce

    Bruce Member

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    It's true.

    I myself am trying to adopt a vegan lifestyle because i realize how much animals suffer just for our self-gratification. We don't even really need meat now that we can harvest nuts, seeds, soy, etc.

    But i think that living with someone who is non-vegan will cause us to feel tempted to go back to our old habits.
     
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  11. Plant Muncher

    Plant Muncher Guest

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    I am fortunate enough to have lived with a vegetarian most of my life. Although I love vegetarian food, I didn't really see veganism as that much of a step beyond vegetarianism. I probably was a bit unwise in that assumption but all in all, it has worked out just fine. I learned from my vegetarian partner the lesson that you don't try and force your food choices on anyone else no matter the reasons for your choices. I knew she was a vegetarian when we met and she knew that I wasn't. Not once in all the years we have been together has there been a disagreement over either of our food choices. Just as she never tried to convince me to become vegetarian, I have never tried to convince her to become vegan.

    I am the cook in the family. I happily cooked vegetarian dish after vegetarian dish over the years because that is what made my wife happy and I enjoyed them all even as a meat eater myself. Today, the vegan dishes I create are met with the same pleasant reception by my wife. My wife isn't a vegan but is quite happy to eat vegan dishes.

    If you can't live with a non-vegan as stated above, you shouldn't have to. Nor would I wan to live with a vegan that tried to make me conform to their beliefs. I'd be happy to listen to them but in the end, it is my decision, not yours. And by "yours" I mean anyone else. I think considering that vegans are a scant few percent of the population as a whole, you are only limiting your own options anyway. Darwin would have something to say about those odds.
     
  12. Consistency
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    Consistency Member

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    You haven't been on a plant based diet long enough to understand that it's the meat eaters who have the problem with others straying off the meat path than anyone else. And not the other way around as you portray. It's the meat eaters who push their beliefs and addictions onto others.

    Are you getting tempted to go back to eating meat by the polycyclic aromatic hydrocarbons released by cooking meat for others? or Are you pretending to be a vegan? What are you trying to gain by regurgitating the same illogical message?

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_dissonance
    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychology_of_eating_meat
     
  13. Damo
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    Damo Administrator Staff Member

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    This thread is way out of control.

    Thread locked, don't create another.
     
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