Is kindness a sign of weakness?

[KLS52]

Generally speaking, I do not think kindness has to be a sign of weakness but I agree that kindness shouldn't = doormat.
I use to be kind/passive and have since learned to speak my mind, but respectfully, regardless of the other person's attitude/position . I don't think I've ever been intentionally unkind. It's not a manner in which I want to behave.
If someone is out and out rude/mean to me (which, luckily, pretty much never happens anyway), I will still respond in a calm manner and maintain my composure. I don't believe in tit for tat. I don't have to resort to their kind of bad behavior to get my point across.

 

[Josh James xVx]

Do not live for others any more than you would expect others to live for you

 

[MrsSchu2u]

I'm in social work. Again, difference between assertive, passive, and aggressive.

 

[I Heart Corey Haim!!]

no i dont kindness is an awesome virtue

peace

 

[shyvas]

I certainly don't. You can also be kind and assertive.

Overhere in France, kind people are considered as the weaker type.

 

[SummerRain]

I agree that kindness doesn't mean allowing yourself to be used. I think kindness is a brave and strong quality. It isn't always easy to be kind, and to do kind things - especially with people you don't like or strangers, but I think you need strength to be able to do it anyway.

At the same time, it drives me nuts when I see people who let themselves be used. I just wouldn't stand for that - you don't have to be mean, you just need to be assertive and say no, this isn't an okay way to treat me, and walk away. I have known people who would let "friends" treat them really badly, and then jump at the chance to be included in something they're doing or to do something for them. That's not kindness, that's not standing up for yourself. Ultimately it helps nobody, because you allow yourself to be treated badly and essentially say "this is an okay way to treat me", and because you allow them to use people and get away with it and let them think that's an okay way to behave.

 

[shyvas]

I agree that kindness doesn't mean allowing yourself to be used. I think kindness is a brave and strong quality. It isn't always easy to be kind, and to do kind things - especially with people you don't like or strangers, but I think you need strength to be able to do it anyway.



At the same time, it drives me nuts when I see people who let themselves be used. I just wouldn't stand for that - you don't have to be mean, you just need to be assertive and say no, this isn't an okay way to treat me, and walk away. I have known people who would let "friends" treat them really badly, and then jump at the chance to be included in something they're doing or to do something for them. That's not kindness, that's not standing up for yourself. Ultimately it helps nobody, because you allow yourself to be treated badly and essentially say "this is an okay way to treat me", and because you allow them to use people and get away with it and let them think that's an okay way to behave.

I think that it is because they desperatley 'need' to be liked. I hate to see people who don't know how to stand up for themselves and will willingly do it if I witness this being done.