Lord Snot
Parsley Provider
My aunt, S, had a child, H, with one man. After their divorce she married another man, D, and had another child. When H was about 22 she revealed to the family that D had sexually abused her since she was 13. My aunt did not shoot him or go into protective mode, instead she decided to protect herself. She called her daughter a liar, defended her husband, and hasn't spoken to H or seen her three grandchildren since.
That's why I don't buy that mums will do anything to protect their young. Sometimes, their own comforts are more important and sometimes, having a child doesn't completely change their personality and the kind of reaction they have to situations.
ETA: S's second daughter was 14 at the time the allegations were made. S chose to leave her second daughter in the same house as D as well as disowning H.
a VERY different situation. coming across a violent situation is very different than being told of something.
and of course everyone's different. but, the moms and dads i know would do something about the situation and it would include protecting the community by inflicting pain on the predator.
Yes. I've seen examples of mothers and fathers doing the opposite of protecting their kids too. It's sometimes the parent who is the abuser.
Lord Snot
Parsley Provider
sure i can. and i still stand behind it.
taking care of something and having very strong feelings towards it creates very very strong protective feelings and a person will often do whatever it takes to protect those in their care. including animals.
Of course there are mothers who will stand by their man rather than protect their children. It happens all the time. But there are also mothers who will do anything to protect their children, without giving it a second thought - it's one of the reasons species survive.
My mother was not good mother material (not her fault - she was the best mother she could be, but she herself was badly and permanently damaged as a child), but neither my sister nor I have any doubt that she would have physically protected us from any third party. As a matter of fact, my sister was sexually molested before I was born, and didn't tell our mother because she was afraid that our mother would kill the man. I'm pretty sure she was right.
My mother was not good mother material (not her fault - she was the best mother she could be, but she herself was badly and permanently damaged as a child), but neither my sister nor I have any doubt that she would have physically protected us from any third party. As a matter of fact, my sister was sexually molested before I was born, and didn't tell our mother because she was afraid that our mother would kill the man. I'm pretty sure she was right.
Lord Snot
Parsley Provider
Obviously not in the case of my aunt, who loved and cared for her daughter until she was 22.
If one of your children called you up now and said "dad, x has been abusing me", would you react the same as my aunt?
I believe that. I just don't understand why it's hard to believe that not every mother/father/person will react the same to something.
perhaps you're forgetting the biological instincts of a parent protecting their young.
Lord Snot
Parsley Provider
Never have i once said every father. i said the folks i know.
Everyone's different and i think honestly that a good parent would get in there and do something, even more so than just snatching the kid and taking off. And god help a parent or anyone else that would see it and ignore it. THAT person also should be in for pain.
Lord Snot
Parsley Provider
You said above "sure I can [make any broad statements about what mothers, or any other group of humans, will do in any given situation.]" And then when I questioned how you could believe ALL parents would act in the same way, you said "perhaps you're forgetting the biological instincts of a parent protecting their young.".
sorry. i missed the ALL. i don't ever make such massive generalizations. i generalize for sure, but it's just dumb to use ALL in a generalization. at least for me.
Lord Snot
Parsley Provider
My reaction would be to quite possibly kill them... I don't care what your aunt would do.
Lord Snot
Parsley Provider
No, my point was that you can't say how somebody would react just because you think you know how YOU would react, as people aren't cookie cutter cut-outs. But it looks like it was a misunderstanding and uno wasn't arguing that. I wouldn't dream of telling someone "you would do the same as my aunt" so I don't like being told "you would do the same as me".
I think there would be a lot more people being murdered if all parents had that reaction considering the high rates of kids being sexually abused.
I've only heard about one case in my local area where a known child molester was murdered but I don't think they ever found a suspect. I don't know what he was doing walking around free anyway but that is the UK justice system for you.
I've only heard about one case in my local area where a known child molester was murdered but I don't think they ever found a suspect. I don't know what he was doing walking around free anyway but that is the UK justice system for you.
Would it be a bad thing if parents murdered suspected child molesters more often? I don't think it's very likely to happen.
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