Were You Raised By Wolves? The Proliferaton of Rude Behavior and Lack of Civility in Today's Society

Moll Flanders said:
Yes, I don't trust charming, polite men at all! I always think they have something to hide. I think it smacks of sexism when a man offers me a seat on the train too. I do tend to take it if my feet hurt though.:cool:
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Some people are just genuinely polite, doesn't have to be an act or a sexist thing ;)
 
I understand the feeling, though. I've been burned many times by seemingly nice people in the past. I'd rather someone be a real *** than a fake saint, you know?
I have a somewhat similar gripe about groups of people walking toward me or behind me on sidewalks. I've been mugged three times like that and I often suspect perfectly innocent people are gonna pull a weapon on me. It's not something I'm proud of and I'm working to get over it, but it rears it's head from time to time
 
Cerebellion said:
As horrible as it sounds, someone once told me that men hold doors for women so they can look at her *** as they walk by.

I try to be nice, though, and hope it's not mistaken for chivalry. Sometimes, results may vary
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A man once told me that men like to sniff women's hair, so they hold open the door. :oops:
 
I get annoyed when someone a few feet ahead of me doesn't open the door for me - man or woman. Nothing to do with gender, it's just fricking common decency. I do it for everyone - man, woman or child. I give up my seat to anyone who appears less able to stand than me, man, woman or child.
 
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AeryFairy said:
Some people are just genuinely polite, doesn't have to be an act or a sexist thing ;)
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Meh. I find it quite smarmy if a man offers me a seat in front of a crowded group of passengers on a train as I'm obviously able-bodied and this has happened to me a few times on my way to work when I was slimmer so he didn't think I was pregnant!:p
 
I won't open a door for someone, but if there is someone close behind me I'll wait with the door propped open so that they can take the door themselves.
I've noticed a lot lately that people seem to think this means I'm standing there specifically to hold the door for them, and they duck through ahead of me without taking the door. Which makes me a lot less inclined to do anything other than just walk on through and the person behind me can fend for themselves.

I long ago gave up trying to hold the door for any man, as so many take the door from me and insist I go through myself. Which means that I then have to shift everything and it's awkward and just not worth the trouble.
 
RabbitLuvr said:
I won't open a door for someone, but if there is someone close behind me I'll wait with the door propped open so that they can take the door themselves.
I've noticed a lot lately that people seem to think this means I'm standing there specifically to hold the door for them, and they duck through ahead of me without taking the door. Which makes me a lot less inclined to do anything other than just walk on through and the person behind me can fend for themselves.

I long ago gave up trying to hold the door for any man, as so many take the door from me and insist I go through myself. Which means that I then have to shift everything and it's awkward and just not worth the trouble.
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I've had that happen once or twice maybe with guys not wanting to go through the door, I always just want to say "It's okay, really! Your ***** won't shrink if you go through first, I promise." ;)
 
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Werewolf Girl said:
I've had that happen once or twice maybe with guys not wanting to go through the door, I always just want to say "It's okay, really! Your ***** won't shrink if you go through first, I promise." ;)
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Hahahahahahah!

I don't mind somebody holding the door for me if it's a really heavy door or I'm holding a lot of stuff and don't have a free hand to do it myself. But I have noticed that sometimes when I hold a door open for one person, suddenly a whole stream of people will go through, like I'm their butler or something. :rolleyes:

What I consider even ruder than holding or not holding a door for me is when a group of people block a doorway or part of a hallway so other people can't get through. Then when I say excuse me and try to squeeze through, they act like I'm being the rude person for having the nerve to interrupt their chatting. :rolleyes:
 
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Amy SF said:
But I have noticed that sometimes when I hold a door open for one person, suddenly a whole stream of people will go through, like I'm their butler or something. :rolleyes:
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Yes! If there's a crowd, or a few people heading towards a door, I absolutely positively won't hold the door for ANYONE. Because I don't want to stand there all day while all the assholes walk through.

Amy SF said:
What I consider even ruder than holding or not holding a door for me is when a group of people block a doorway or part of a hallway so other people can't get through. Then when I say excuse me and try to squeeze through, they act like I'm being the rude person for having the nerve to interrupt their chatting. :rolleyes:
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This pisses me off. Also, people who walk really slowly but insist on walking right down the middle of the corridor instead of off to one side so people can go around them. Get out of my way!!
 
Lord Snot said:
One of the most outwardly courteous/gentlemanly men I'm acquainted with is a wife beater. Appearances are not what they seem.
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:yes:

My stepdad was an abusive son of a ***** in private yet outwardly he was a 'pillar of the community'. Devout catholic, went to mass every sunday, made all of the proper appearances in public, and always donated money where it would give him the best media exposure.

He was quite the actor, that one!
 
I very much dislike it when people race me into the coffee shop, or purposely don't hold the door for fear I will get into line first. If someone holds the door for me, I will still let them ahead in line. They were first after all.

It's really kind of funny when I see people notice me walking towards the same place and they do a quick walk or slow jog to get in first :rofl:Worth the wait in line.
 
I live in the most passive aggressive state in the Union - but having formally lived in New York City, I'd much rather someone risk being rude to me in order to tell me what they really think - than having pent up angst toward me. What is often perceived as rude can be someone being open and honest.

I work in a hospital - so I really make an effort to try to smile at people when I'm walking down the hall - no matter who they are, patient or employee. In a month I can count on one hand the number of people who smile back. So much for spreading good cheer.
 
Dedalus said:
I live in the most passive aggressive state in the Union - but having formally lived in New York City, I'd much rather someone risk being rude to me in order to tell me what they really think - than having pent up angst toward me. What is often perceived as rude can be someone being open and honest.

I work in a hospital - so I really make an effort to try to smile at people when I'm walking down the hall - no matter who they are, patient or employee. In a month I can count on one hand the number of people who smile back. So much for spreading good cheer.
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I work in a hospital also, and it's actually company policy that employees have to be cheerful and smile and be pleasant to everyone. It's brought up at every monthly department meeting and employees are told to leave their problems at home and so forth. I certainly do try, but there are times when I'm in a bad mood or not feeling well, so I probably fail miserably at that some days. I'm not being rude, I just have indigestion. :p
 
Years ago I went to a coffee place. As I was leaving a woman was standing there talking to someone holding the door open with her back. As I passed between the two women talking I ducked a bit and said "excuse me." Apparently this rude person leaning against the door also couldn't hear and stated loudly something like "YOU CAN'T AT LEAST SAY THANK YOU WHEN SOMEONE HOLDS THE DOOR OPEN" I didn't reply but I remember it ruined by day. And I've never been back to that coffee place again.

I work in a convalescent hospital and I know we are supposed to be cheerful all the time also. A couple of weeks ago I had a family member tell me "the only reason I'm not screaming is because there are other patients around." I take that as: 'I can yell at you if I want and there is nothing you can do about it.' Which of coarse is true.
 
If I get the chance, I will hold the door for someone, but I won't exactly go out of my way just to open an unlocked door.
 
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