The Coffee House-Come & Chat With Us! (June 2020)

[Urban Gardener]

It is a disaster. And I have to wonder if some people (or groups) are intentionally instigating in hopes of drawing more crowds and spreading COVID within the black community. Statistically, it affects Hispanics and African-Americans more than white people.

For example, the cops who are harming people - maybe some actually want more POC to come out and protest and then get sick?

Just a crazy thought. Look at the accounts of people being crammed into garages and other enclosures together without actually being arrested.

And Trump's increasingly bizarre behavior - it's as if he wants COVID to kill certain groups of people (lower income, POC, older people, people with chronic health conditions). He's deranged. We're in danger. And there's still too much sugarcoating going on. We need more action.

I'm tired after a long day. I could have phrased that better, but you know what I mean.

 

[Sax]

I saw a guy at the grocery store today wearing a shirt that said "carnivore" with some muscle-y anthropomorphized bull flexing. Like, a) you're picking out bananas right now and 2) bulls are herbivores!

 

[Freesia]

OTOH, it's winter at where you are... Is it supposed to be warmer? Or colder? Is there a lot of sleet?
We've had the winter which was almost like yours, though it's supposed to be fierce... harsh russian winter... and what? Right - . I put on my winter coat only 3 times. No snow, only muddy puddles. That's why ticks are so active now,- moreover, they mutated, and now they are threatening lives of Siberians (that was what i saw on the news on Monday).

its not really cold yet, just rainy with windy storms. but i have had the heater on because i am a giant wuss. the sleet i mentioned only happened once, stunning residents. the worst is usually some frost and damp cold. it is almost sub tropical here, some limited variety of bananas can grow, the smaller more temperate suited varieties.

 

[Amy SF]

I didn’t know about #BlackoutTuesday until it was almost over.

 

[Raven]

I feel really tired today. I am getting so sick of being indoors so much.

I think I will go for a walk and listen to a podcast.

 

[KLS52]

I didn’t know about #BlackoutTuesday until it was almost over.

Now I’m seeing posts on FB about how we shouldn’t have participated in blackout Tuesday because it shut down and took away from the whole issue. Some people were saying we needed to continue to flood Facebook with videos and other informational posts.

I’m so confused. I’m debating whether to start some conversations but not sure which thread to go to or if I should start a new one. I have so many questions and I want to be informed. The problem with doing my own research is that there are too many conflicting viewpoints. I’d rather ask people whom I have some kind of relationship with...and you guys are it lol. But I also have a bit of PTSD from my VB days where if you were the least bit naive and put yourself out there, you got jumped on. Not saying anyone here would jump on me but I have some hard questions and I just don’t know where to get the answers.

I did watch a really good video...I think poppy posted it on FB...it was a black man answering some hard questions. It was informative and helpful but raised more questions from me. He is planning on doing a whole series. I will have to be on the lookout for it.

But then...another video came across my feed and I have to say I was quite shocked by it. A black woman named Candace Owens...completely denouncing wrong-doing by police claiming there’s no such thing as police brutality against blacks. And also bringing out every bad thing that George Floyd did. Apparently hd has a pretty long record. And while she doesn’t condone how he died she kept regretting him as not a good man and a criminal. Then I looked her up and realized she’s been out there awhile...she’s a Trump supporter. So that pretty much cleared things up for me right away. Lol. But I imagine she’s not the only one out there who thinks like that. So that is confusing to me.

Anyway, I know this is a chat thread and anything goes but if any part of this post would do better somewhere else feel free to move it. I don’t want to get too heavy in here. But for some reason this just came pouring out. I wish I had the self control to self ban myself from social media even for a day. The longest I’ve ever gotten with that was a few hours lol.

Oh...morning peeps, haha.

 

[Chryssie]

Morning/afternoon y'all! It is cloudy this morning and there will be more rain. The whole week through the weekend will be rainy. It is that tropical system in the gulf driving rain our way. I am not happy because with 3 days off, I wanted to do some park walking. Oh well. Today is Thursday which means Sweets-n-Eats tonight even if it is raining! I will read more today.
I admit that I am always watching the news and FB to stay informed. The protests in my town have been peaceful and well organized and while I support them, I stay away. I am wary of large gatherings even though Florida is charging ahead with re-opening.

 

[Raven]

I haven't really been following the news but I heard today that they are charging the police involved with a tougher penalty. There have been protests here in London. I feel very cut off from society now I'm not going anywhere on public transport!

 

[Urban Gardener]

Responding to everything quoted here (expand):

Now I’m seeing posts on FB about how we shouldn’t have participated in blackout Tuesday because it shut down and took away from the whole issue. Some people were saying we needed to continue to flood Facebook with videos and other informational posts.

I’m so confused. I’m debating whether to start some conversations but not sure which thread to go to or if I should start a new one. I have so many questions and I want to be informed. The problem with doing my own research is that there are too many conflicting viewpoints. I’d rather ask people whom I have some kind of relationship with...and you guys are it lol. But I also have a bit of PTSD from my VB days where if you were the least bit naive and put yourself out there, you got jumped on. Not saying anyone here would jump on me but I have some hard questions and I just don’t know where to get the answers.

I did watch a really good video...I think poppy posted it on FB...it was a black man answering some hard questions. It was informative and helpful but raised more questions from me. He is planning on doing a whole series. I will have to be on the lookout for it.

But then...another video came across my feed and I have to say I was quite shocked by it. A black woman named Candace Owens...completely denouncing wrong-doing by police claiming there’s no such thing as police brutality against blacks. And also bringing out every bad thing that George Floyd did. Apparently hd has a pretty long record. And while she doesn’t condone how he died she kept regretting him as not a good man and a criminal. Then I looked her up and realized she’s been out there awhile...she’s a Trump supporter. So that pretty much cleared things up for me right away. Lol. But I imagine she’s not the only one out there who thinks like that. So that is confusing to me.

Pick any group of people and you'll find all kinds of people with all kinds of views.

Look at the views represented here. And we're a small group of people who chose a certain lifestyle and chose to join this particular forum. No one chooses their heritage. So within any group of people who have that in common, you'll literally find all kinds of people. More diverse than VF.

That's why it's important to listen to a variety of people. And it sounds like that's what you're doing.

I'm white and I don't claim to represent the black community. This is just my understanding of things.

Also, I understand getting attacked online and how jarring it can be. I've found it helps to write important, longer posts offline and do a few revisions before posting them. I try to state everything clearly - so it will mean almost the same thing across language barriers, cultural differences, etc. And I'm sparing about it. I pick topics that I feel strongly about and have clear views about. I also decide in advance how to handle upsetting comments. Usually, I converse with people who respectfully disagree and unfriend/block people who just insult me or anything else that's counter-productive.

 

[Freesia]

I dont really debate with people online anymore as i am not a fan of attack and drag tactics. Anyone who tries to do that to me gets blocked, on websites which have a block feature anyway. I have enough to deal with every day without having to shoulder the neuroses of complete strangers.

 

[Urban Gardener]

I dont really debate with people online anymore as i am not a fan of attack and drag tactics. Anyone who tries to do that to me gets blocked, on websites which have a block feature anyway. I have enough to deal with every day without having to shoulder the neuroses of complete strangers.

I hear you. People freak out over the smallest things and miss the main point.

Writing that welcomes comments is a great idea. Unfortunately, most of our social media platforms seem to promote counter-productive ways of discussing things, rending it more effective to just put your writing in print.

 

[Mikkel]

They're digging up the street outside of my house. Exact oudside of my bedroom in fact. And they start at 7 am... So early bedtime this weeks.

I fell asleep on the couch later on the day. Dreaming that Rime and I was at a book store to buy the latest Hunger Games book. But there was a big bar fight there over the few books, so no book for us...

 

[Mikkel]

I dont really debate with people online anymore as i am not a fan of attack and drag tactics. Anyone who tries to do that to me gets blocked, on websites which have a block feature anyway. I have enough to deal with every day without having to shoulder the neuroses of complete strangers.

The only fun thing with online debates now, is trolling antivaxxers...

But when Facebook came for real and took over for a lot of forums, I think the good debates were lost. Strangely as people now show off their sometimes very special meanings with full name and not just a nick...

 

[silva]

Now I’m seeing posts on FB about how we shouldn’t have participated in blackout Tuesday because it shut down and took away from the whole issue. Some people were saying we needed to continue to flood Facebook with videos and other informational posts.

I’m so confused. I’m debating whether to start some conversations but not sure which thread to go to or if I should start a new one. I have so many questions and I want to be informed. The problem with doing my own research is that there are too many conflicting viewpoints. I’d rather ask people whom I have some kind of relationship with...and you guys are it lol. But I also have a bit of PTSD from my VB days where if you were the least bit naive and put yourself out there, you got jumped on. Not saying anyone here would jump on me but I have some hard questions and I just don’t know where to get the answers.

I did watch a really good video...I think poppy posted it on FB...it was a black man answering some hard questions. It was informative and helpful but raised more questions from me. He is planning on doing a whole series. I will have to be on the lookout for it.

But then...another video came across my feed and I have to say I was quite shocked by it. A black woman named Candace Owens...completely denouncing wrong-doing by police claiming there’s no such thing as police brutality against blacks. And also bringing out every bad thing that George Floyd did. Apparently hd has a pretty long record. And while she doesn’t condone how he died she kept regretting him as not a good man and a criminal. Then I looked her up and realized she’s been out there awhile...she’s a Trump supporter. So that pretty much cleared things up for me right away. Lol. But I imagine she’s not the only one out there who thinks like that. So that is confusing to me.

Anyway, I know this is a chat thread and anything goes but if any part of this post would do better somewhere else feel free to move it. I don’t want to get too heavy in here. But for some reason this just came pouring out. I wish I had the self control to self ban myself from social media even for a day. The longest I’ve ever gotten with that was a few hours lol.

Oh...morning peeps, haha.

I listened to candace owens, and was reminded what a true piece of scum she is. I can't think of a single time a white man was unjustly killed where his life was picked apart and trashe, or his parents, wife, kids. even if someone made remarks about it they would be admonished. She let out a slew of largely incorrect facts about George just to prove her point about how it was, not that she justified it, but........
He spent money in a store, there was nothing that connected him to knowledge of passing a bad bill. The video shows nothing of him being beligerant or crazed. A white man with money getting handcuffed for that would have a lawyer on the police dept and they'd bend over backwards to kiss his as
Besides the killing, it's infuriating people refuse to understand the problem

 

[silva]

Working 4 day a week does feel awfully good! If only I could afford it.............
Again I helped my son buy a car with another promise of quick payback . I hope his job is secure!

 

[PTree15]

I hear you. People freak out over the smallest things and miss the main point.

Writing that welcomes comments is a great idea. Unfortunately, most of our social media platforms seem to promote counter-productive ways of discussing things, rending it more effective to just put your writing in print.

This is a huge problem. People automatically get defensive if they're called out on something, and it just shuts down the needed conversation. I do not espouse name calling and insulting of any kind, but I will call out, as respectfully as possible, things I disagree with. As a society, we seem to have lost the art of debate without taking things personally. My friends and family run the political gamut. I can sanely discuss politics with some members of my circle, but not with all of them because they take disagreement as a personal attack. At the end of the day, I still love them; I just might not agree with everything they believe in.

 

[KLS52]

I don’t mind being called out if it’s not an attack, mainly because I would never intentionally be a jerk. But my sheltered upbringing has left me lacking in certain areas. I’m trying to learn and become a better person. But it’s hard if you can’t ask honest questions without people thinking that you’re being ridiculous and that you should know better. So I’m careful about what I ask online.

 

[Mikkel]

Oh. Scotland.

Scotland to become first nation in the world to teach LGBTQ history in schools

By 2021, schools across the country are expected to include lessons about LGBTQ equality and history in their educational plans.

www.edinburghlive.co.uk

 

[PTree15]

I don’t mind being called out if it’s not an attack, mainly because I would never intentionally be a jerk. But my sheltered upbringing has left me lacking in certain areas. I’m trying to learn and become a better person. But it’s hard if you can’t ask honest questions without people thinking that you’re being ridiculous and that you should know better. So I’m careful about what I ask online.

i certainly understand that, and online is different environment and can be quite hostile. You're doing the right thing by learning. I have been trying to do the same for years. But if white people get called out by a person of color, it may not be pleasant and it may feel like an attack, but it's frustration, fatigue and anger over never, ever really being heard.

This kind of change will not be pleasant. It's going to take hard work, hard discussions. And it's going to require white people having to hear a lot of unpleasant truths, like the fact that many of us haven't been doing enough, and we need to recognize that regardless of unintentional bias resulting from of our upbringing. People of color aren't interested in how white people feel, because it's not about white people.

 

[Urban Gardener]

A lot of people suddenly act differently when money is at stake. There is a tendency to appeal to the white male demographic because they have the most spending power and influence in society.

We need to recognize that in ourselves and stop. We need to recognize it in our friends and urge them to change. The business model should be to be welcoming to everyone, not to prioritize one group of people.

And by "business," I mean all things involving money or some kind of accomplishment. Hobbies, creative projects, activism and volunteer work also count.