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9month old vegan baby, partners family do not understand!

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by VeganMumma, Aug 23, 2017.

  1. VeganMumma

    VeganMumma New Member

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    I have been vegetarian my whole life, turned vegan in January this year and am raising my baby vegan. My partners family are all meat eaters, but all seemed pretty accepting of the fact that I was vegetarian when we first got together and always went to the effort of catering for me. Since turning vegan and also mutually deciding with my partner to bringing up our little boy vegan, I feel like i'm constantly repeating myself as to what we do and do not eat, i find myself always bringing my own food to their house when we go for dinner (which i do not mind at all, but it's the still offering of garlic bread, containing milk/butter, puddings containing egg etc). I guess the biggest frustration for me though, is that they have the attitude that I am STOPPING my son from eating things that they eat, and comments like 'it will be interesting when he starts going to friends parties' 'sorry baby you aren't allowed this (a prawn cracker), maybe one day though' and jokey comments like 'he has all the treats when I look after him'.
    I have laughed things off until now but it is really starting to concern/anger me. They have never actually showed any interest in what he does eat! I do not want it to get to a point where I suddenly explode and end up being rude so please any advice on how to deal with this situation calmly and effectively next time a comment is made will be appreciated :) or support from anyone that has gone through the same thing...
     
    Last edited: Aug 23, 2017
  2. amberfunk

    amberfunk Active Member

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    Be a mama bear and put your food down. Give them a list of what he does not eat. He's your child and you need to make it quite clear to them. Tell them that you do not appreciate the comments that it's rude and upsetting to you.
     
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  3. Emma JC
    Joyful

    Emma JC Active Member

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    congrats on your decision to be veg and raise your child as such!

    Is it possible that they are concerned about whether it is healthy for the baby and are just not verbalizing it? Maybe point them towards an amazing vegan family on YouTube that are raising their child vegan... one example is:

    Sarah Lemkus http://www.sarahlemkus.com/ https://www.youtube.com/c/sarahlemkus

    Sarah, and her husband, have a toddler and are currently pregnant and I admire their balance and joy in life.

    Emma JC
     
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  4. VeganMumma

    VeganMumma New Member

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    thank you! I feel like I should have done this a lot sooner eg when he started weaning. Over the next couple of weeks I think I will start packing his food in a cooler bag and stick on a list and explain this is what he can eat if he needs an extra snack/what to look out for on packaging if you're out and want to grab a treat etc. And as for the comments I will definitely say something next time as it's happened too many times to brush off.
     
  5. VeganMumma

    VeganMumma New Member

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  6. Mark Mywordz
    Feuding

    Mark Mywordz Active Member

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    Try not to discuss diet as much as possible. Don't label food "vegan" or "non-vegan". It's just the food that you give your baby. It's a good idea to take food with you when you visit. Make your relatives a gorgeous vegan cake or dessert.
    Definitely discuss the problem with the outlaws but do so in a way that asks for their help and is non-confrontational. Reassure them that you love them and appreciate their advice and only want to do the best for your baby.
    You must remain positive, that is the most important thing.
     
  7. Plant Muncher

    Plant Muncher Guest

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    Parents are going to do what parents are going to do. You can't change them and they can be the source of a lot of frustration when it comes to "their" grandchildren. My parents made mistakes and I made mistakes and my kids will make mistakes with regard to child rearing. Sometimes we make different mistakes but more often than you think, you make the same mistakes and clearly there is little tolerance for doing things differently.
     
  8. Rory17

    Rory17 Member

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    Hi.
    In your situation, I would advise that you talk to them politely about this. Explain that vegan children are not necessarily missing out on nutrition, and they can still have some treats. Explain that you are vegan, and that it is your choice to raise him as a vegan. Many parents raise their kids with the values that they hold dear to them. You are doing that. Also, you could politely ask them to stop giving him non-vegan food. Say that it is offensive to you and that you are his parents, not them.
    Why would you give your child meat when you're a vegan for ethical reasons? That would be like raising your child to be a Muslim when you're a Jew...
    Best of luck.
     
  9. veganDreama

    veganDreama Active Member

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    Congratulations on going vegan and putting your baby on a vegan diet. I have a friend who has two small boys and is raising them vegan. They are healthy as I'm sure your child is.

    You will have to explain to your family that how you raise your son is your own affair. Not theirs. And explain that a vegan diet has all the nutrition needed except B12 which can be obtained by supplements or fortified food.
     

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