Friendless

[Animallover21]

Yay being friendless. Not really.

Tired of meeting mentally insane people. Seriously why is everyone I meet super crazy?
Also I know I have super high morals which is another reason I have no friends.

But life has never been so lonelier. I literally have zero friends.

I have aquaintences. But no friends. The one I had, her and I just stopped being friends a second ago because she is off her rocker. Seriously, so insane. But sad at the fact we won't be speaking anymore because now that means I have zero friends. Plus it's complicated, so I am mourning our friendship but she was really crazy so its for the better. But she was a huge support system and my only one, so now I don't know how to function without her. Which isn't healthy. My friendship should have ended with her months ago but we kept becoming friends again because I couldn't function without having her as my support system because i became so codependent on her for that. Obviously I am not the only crazy person and I have my own issues and I know what they are. But I am not crazy like all these other people where they treat other people like crap and put the blame on the other person and i dont do all the other crap these jerks do. Also she cheated on her husband for two years and didn't tell me she even had a husband she was cheating on until after we were already best friends. So when she finally told me it was like I became trapped. And then she didn't end it with her husband until four months after we became friends. And then she was so disrespectful throughout our frienship (starting four months after) and certain Behaviors of hers are so crazy and I cannot get this through to her and it drives me insane and makes me want to pull my hair out.

But I kept not wanting to be her friend because of the cheating thing and then after that she kept treating me so bad and then when I finally had the strength to end it I always went back to being her friend because I was so use to having her as my support system and became codependent on that. And no one else understands my issues like she does and no one is supportive like she is to me. At least no one I have met but I need to respect myself and stop being so codependent on someone who can treat me so bad and be so selfish . And have such low morals.and I haven't really even let the past go because I kept forgiving her but then she would treat me bad again. Anytime she does anything now I overreact because I have taken too much from her already so I cannot handle anymore now. Plus her and I have nothing in commo . Like I said she is just a support system and was there for me during some hard times and is the only one who has understood and supported me through my hard times.

Anyway enough of that. Just needed to vent.

Just because I am so use to having her as my support system and i literally have no one else. Pathetic I know.

Now I don't know what to do. I don't want to go meet anyone either. I am not hopeful in finding someone who is a good person and loves animals like me and is weird like me.

And for online, I am not hopeful I will find anyone who actually wants to be my friend too.

I shall be a hermit.

At least I have my bunny. She shall be my only friend then.

This sounds sad and pathetic. Hahahha.

But I had to vent.

 

[Second Summer]

It's not easy. I don't know you or your situation very well, but it sounds like you might need to learn to better stand on your own two feet? Being dependent on others isn't a good thing, most of the time. Maybe once you've become more independent, you'll be better able to have more healthy friendships?

I'd try going to vegan meet-ups or something, if you live in an area that have those. (Quite common in US metropolitan areas, I think.)

 

[KLS52]

 

[kita]

I don't really have friends either. I don't relate well to the little family I have. I fear I'm becoming more self isolating.

I'd try something before you end up like me.

 

[Poppy]

Don't discount online friendships! Seriously, I consider some of the people I know here to be very good friends. It takes time to get to know people online, but it can be so worth it!

As far as friends in real life, perhaps you expect too much. Develop some of your acquaintances, without expecting that every one will become a deep friendship. Having a few more casual relationships that you're comfortable with might help you rely less on this one person, and who knows, you might find someone else you really like.

 

[Andy_T]

I am not sure if I can really count omni people to be my friends.
There are some I do things with (especially if they have similar families, e.g. our kids are at the same age), but I feel that there is a gap in mutual understanding that might be hard to bridge.

My wife once told me that I do not have any real friends - and to be honest, I am not really sure if I do need any.

There are a few vegan people I know in person who I only meet seldom - and some (like you) who I never meat in person, but only online now and then - but to whom I somehow nevertheless feel a stronger connection than to our omni "friends".

 

[Moll Flanders]

I fell out with a couple of omni friends when I went vegan, I think that might be common as I have talked to other vegans and they have said it can cause friction in relationships. Vegan meet-ups were really good for me when I first went vegan because I think it can be very isolating at first. Obviously, it can be harder depending on where you live.

Personally, I find it very hard to stay in contact with friends. There is often not a specific reason why, but I generally lose contact with people very easily. Someone came over to my house yesterday and she asked if I had seen a mutual friend of ours and I thought that it has been maybe three years since I have seen her or called her on the phone. I think being in a relationship for so long has made me complacent too, so I don't make as much effort maintaining friendships as I could/should.

Also I know I have super high morals which is another reason I have no friends.

I have volunteered to work for a charity in the past and met nice people through that, so that could be one way of making new friends as you will probably meet like-minded people who give up their time for others.

 

[KLS52]

I agree with Poppy...online friends are awesome. I cherish all of mine. [emoji175]

I have a few people that I consider close friends. Some are from childhood whereby the bond is so strong, we can live miles apart and only speak to each other occasionally but you know and feel that you are true friends forever.

I also maintain very close relationships with my three adult children, my sister and several cousins that I grew up with, so any need there might be for friends is fulfilled that way.

There are 2-3 people at work that I am very close to as well. I am very fortunate. As I get older I am becoming somewhat of a hermit, though, lol, and do not have a need to get out and socialize. Work supplies all the people contact I seem to need. Doing anything outside of that no longer appeals to me, with the exception of getting together with family.

My two daughters and I group text every single day, pretty much up until bedtime. Sometimes I have to turn off my phone and then, when I wake up, there are 22 texts I have to read to catch up, haha.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[Calliegirl]

I agree, it's hard to consider omni's as close friends. There's something grating about them constantly saying how they would stop eating meat but..., or how they admire what you're doing and then talk about how they cooked their pork chops the night before.
I have people I've known for over 10 years (one for over 40 years) and we were close at one time, but our lives have gone on such different paths, it's hard to be as close as before. I'm not sure what I consider them, more than an acquaintance but not quite a friend as we rarely speak (just FB friends now).

I'm not much of a people person anyway and really enjoy my time being mine, so I'm comfortable with most of the people I would consider 'friends' being online. I think a lot of that though is because I have so many projects I'm working on, I don't have time to spare to just hang out, go to the movies, shopping, etc. I don't have enough time to get to everything I want to do as it is.

 

[vegannatasha]

I only have animal friends.

 

[Chryssie]

I have no real friends IRL, only my sister. I have "work friends", but never see them outside of work. Sherri, my neighbor, is a friend but we don't "hang out" much especially since she has a BF now. I never have had a bunch of friends like some people do. And when I got married, my husband(s) were my best friends but I am alone now. Online friends have always been "true friends" to me.

 

[Val]

Online friends have always been "true friends" to me.

The same here.

 

[KLS52]

Interesting that as I get older and less interested in socializing (which probably has less to do with age than it does with having anxiety and more recently, just a touch of mild depression), I don’t have the need to connect with friends other than online or via text/email. Then again, I see people five days a week at work and get so much interaction. And I do enjoy that. I hope that’s all it is and not a case of me becoming a hermit!

 

[KLS52]

I also feel like relationships are so much work sometimes and I’m so tired from working full time and dealing with my friends there, that I just need to be left alone on the weekends. I have several work friends who are so needy it’s exhausting.

I do consider my work friends “friends”. We may rarely socialize outside of work but we can tell each other anything and we are there for each other whenever one of us needs it.

 

[PTree15]

I also feel like relationships are so much work sometimes and I’m so tired from working full time and dealing with my friends there, that I just need to be left alone on the weekends. I have several work friends who are so needy it’s exhausting.

I do consider my work friends “friends”. We may rarely socialize outside of work but we can tell each other anything and we are there for each other whenever one of us needs it.

I miss my work friends. A couple of them were as you describe. We could tell one another anything and were indeed there for one another when necessary. My former workout buddy lives on the other side of the state, and we used to use that morning time with each other to catch up and act as sounding boards for each other. We chat on the phone now, but I miss our workouts and just socializing at work in general. She has a family and is always so busy schlepping her children everywhere. I am lucky that I have some very close friends outside of work, though.

As a single person with no children, my social circle is important to me, along with some fantastic online friends. Some of those friends have become IRL friends as well, and I feel fortunate for them.

 

[vegannatasha]

I think it's really hard to make friends since most people are not very kind. It's hard to find good people in this world.

 

[shyvas]

You only need a few.

 

[vegannatasha]

I have 0

 

[Val]

I have 0

I have 0 IRL too.

 

[vegannatasha]