Okay, I am new to the forum and wanted to add my thoughts to this.
I agree to an extent with the premise of the OP's statement "Let's make veganism less strict", but not with the suggestions.
I have no need to eat cake or ice-cream at a friends house, and doing so would only make veganism look fake. Purposefully declining such things unless they are vegan versions is IMO essential if we are to spread the message.
We don't have to be rude, but that's essentially a flexitarian approach. So definitely not in any way shape or form, veganism.
Not to mention that I feel the dairy industry is
more cruel than the beef industry. If I was forced at gunpoint to choose a glass of milk or a steak, I would take the steak. Luckily that's unlikely and I choose neither.
I only transitioned 3 months ago. I had been thinking about it for a while. But my family are not vegan. An upside is that I cook all the meals, which are now 90% vegan. The kids get non-vegan from me (if they wish) once a week, but my youngest has said they want to be vegan too now so that's a plus.
So essentially our family is 90% vegan. Me at 100% and them the rest. I figure me turning vegan in a family of four has made an equivalent of 3 more vegans in the world.
Since I made the change I have no eaten any animal products, or bought leather, wool etc.
But our dog eats dogfood with animal products. If we replace him in years to come I will attempt to do a vegan diet, but hopefully by then biomeat will be mainstream and there will be no issue.
And of course some hardline vegans will say "You are not vegan" because of the dog. Nope. His health is my responsibility.
Someone mentioned cars and the animal products that they contain... That to me falls under the term "practicable". I need a new car, cars are not themselves vegan, therefore it is not practicable for me to buy a "vegan car". Maybe one exists, but it isn't like swapping mayo to vegan...It's a huge expense.
I also am not against responsible dog breeding. Not "puppy farms" of course, but small breeders who keep the vast range of wonderful dog breeds alive and strong. Yep, I love dogs. And as mentioned, very soon, biomeat will allow for a fully nutritious no-suffering version of dog (and cat) food.
Of course, where possible, we should adopt from rescue centres, but it isn't always possible or practicable.
Where I live there are none...Nor are there any strays wandering around. It is not an issue here as far as I can tell.
The other area where I get called out is with "mistakes". Not that it's an issue with me, as my family are omnivores, but if someone is vegan, buys the wrong (eg. Ramen) that has milk in it, opens it, starts eating and then rescans the packet, they are fully justified in finishing it and being more vigilant next time. It's insane that many vegans suggest chucking it out.
The same thing with clothes bought prior to the change. I have leather MC gear, shoes, belts. I have wool jumpers. I will use them all until they are in need of replacing.
Some vegans say "But you are advertising" - I call BS on that. If veganism was a majority...I'd agree. It isn't. Omnivores / carnists are oblivious to such things. Sure, if you turn up in a leather jacket and then say "I'm vegan" it can be a long conversation, but other than that, it's better that those products be used. By all means pass them on, but that has ZERO utilitarian effect. It really doesn't matter WHO uses it.
Lastly, rescued animals.
I don't eat eggs or buy wool any longer, but I feel that rescued sheep, hens are still going to produce excess. I see nothing wrong with using such wool, or eggs. Some people will then say "But the eggs are eaten by the chicken for calcium" - Feed the hens a calcium rich diet then they won't need to!
And rescued sheep will still need shearing. That wool should not be thrown away, but used. And again, at a utilitarian level, it really makes little difference who uses it.
Thanks,
And feel free to disagree!